A Modern Muggleborn in Hogwarts
by tailysnaily
Summary: 1. Macarena at the Yule Ball / 2. HEELEYS IN THE HALLWAYS. where I'm gonna dump all my muggleborn headcanon oneshots. warning: its the 90s. that's your warning. idk wtd when i get creative (lol?) and all the characters start changing. INFINITE CHARACTER LIST?
1. AYE MACARENA

"Why are you doing this again, Lee?"

"We're still a bit confused, mate."

Lee sighed and looked back at Fred and George. They were his best friends, and he loved them, he really did, but they were magically born and raised. They just didn't understand.

"I've explained it a million times. My mum was a muggle. I was brought up halfway in the muggle world. And at a party like this? Some songs are just essential," he grinned at them, happy that he was about to make the night a lot better for the halfbloods and muggleborns in the room, "And that is why I'm doing this."

His friends shrugged, grinned, and went along with him. They were just happy to be causing trouble, even if they didn't understand the trouble. Lee continued watching the Weird Sisters perform, waiting for the end of the song. The lead singer of the band, a muggleborn, knew all about his plan and thought it was a great idea (he wasn't sure how the twins managed to sneak him into the rooms the band was staying in, but he wasn't gonna ask questions). The Yule Ball was going great already, but Lee knew his plan would make the night even more memorable.

The song finished up, and with a wink at Lee, the band backed away from the front of the stage. Quickly, before McGonagall or anyone else could stop him, Lee hopped on stage and smiled brightly at the crowd of confused students.

"Ladies and gentlemen, are we having a good time tonight?!" Lee shouted, taking the ensuing cheers as a yes. Nodding, he pulled his wand from his dress robes and addressed his classmates again.

"Now, for the purebloods and some halfbloods in the room, you guys have had an awesome night dancing to your favorite band. For the muggleborns and some other halfbloods, you guys have had fun, but you're missing how you're used to having fun. So I took it upon myself to dedicate some of tonight's music to the muggle-raised in the room. To the party animals of Hogwarts, here is your party music!"

With a flourish, Lee spun around and waved a spell at the ancient-looking music player next to the stage, already prepared to play exactly what he wanted. A second later, upbeat music filled the room and made the people who knew what is was shriek and laugh, before maneuvering themselves into lines. The other, confused wizards and witches watched, bewildered from the sidelines, as their friends and dates shouted in unison, "AYE MACARENA!"

Lee jumped off stage and joined the dancing students, moving his arms and hips in the strange motions that everyone seemed to know. He ended up next to a no longer sulking Harry Potter, and a beaming Hermione Granger. The dancing and laughing continued until some brave students infiltrated the lines and asked to be taught. Delighted, Jordan showed Fred and George. Around him, Harry taught Ron and the Patil twins, Hermione taught Viktor Krum and his friends, Alicia Spinnet taught Angelina Johnson and some Beauxbatons students, Dean Thomas taught Neville Longbottom and Ginny Weasley, and countless others were learning the dance.

And this is how the night continued, with some people gettin' jiggy with old, familiar songs, and others learning how to dance to this new, different music. At the end of the night, kids kept clapping Lee on the back and thanking him for brining good tunes, or asking him how he managed it. Lee even caught Seamus Finnigan and Neville MC Hammering on their way back to the common room.

The best part, though, was that he didn't get in any trouble. None of his teachers said a word to him. When Fred and George asked later how that was possible, Lee just smiled, and kept to himself how he saw Dumbledore mouthing the words to "Baby Got Back".

**Okay. I took some liberties with this one. I have no clue what Lee Jordan's parentage is, but whatevs yo. I also have no clue if the Macarena was immediately popular the year it came out. I don't know if Dumbledore is a Sir Mix-a-lot fan, either. But you know what I do know? THIS IS WAS WAY FUN, AND I'M GOING TO BE WRITING MORE MODERN MUGGLEBORN ONESHOTS FO SHO. Have any muggleborn headcanons you wanna see written out? Send em this way. Can't promise they'll be good (this one certainly wasn't LMAO) or that I'll write em, but I'll try while I'm having fun with this. **

**come say hi to me on tumblr, my url is expelliar-moose, because im a loser. **


	2. Heeleys in Hogwarts

**I'M SO SORRY. THIS IS PROBABLY JUST CRACK. **

* * *

Parvati really had no clue what was going on when Terry Boot practically flew past her in the corridor outside Transfiguration. He wasn't _flying _though – his feet were on the ground. Terry was almost... gliding? Confused, she turned to her sister, who looked annoyed beyond all belief.

"What's all that about?" she asked, "What spell did he put on his shoes?"

Shaking her head, Padma huffed an irritated breath and ground out, "He's been doing it all day, and 'to get to his classes more quickly' he says. Rubbish. There was some ridiculous name he called them – a Muggle thing, I'm sure," she thought hard for a moment, "Footsies? No. Oh, I don't know. Something strange. But its not a spell, he's wearing some special Muggle trainers."

Hermione Granger, who'd been walking in front of them, turned around and grinned at them, "They're called Heeleys! There are little wheels in the heels and you can kick off and roll. They're a bit of a hazard, but also quite fun!"

Parvati thought that was rather ingenious, and Padma's exasperated face only made her giggle.

"He's going to get in trouble. Or he's going to trip over his own robes. Or trip over someone _else's_ robes. Or bowl into Professor Snape!" Padma predicted.

But Hermione only shared a grin with Parvati and said, "Yes, probably. But if any of those things happen, we can all laugh at him as he carefully clomps to detention with unstable trainers."

Padma shook her head again, and would have probably complained more about the stupidity of _wheeled shoes_, but was interrupted by Harry Potter, who had stopped next to them in the hallway. He was cleaning his glasses and squinting down the hallway he had just come from, before turning to them with a confused grin, "Was that Terry Boot and Dean Thomas I just saw racing down the corridor in Heeleys?" he asked, delightedly baffled, as if the fact that two idiot boys were racing their Muggle wheeled shoes where Professor McGonagall could catch them at any time was just too good to be true.

Well that's probably what her sister was thinking as she stormed away (with a parting, "UGHGHHGH! IT'S SPREADING!"), but Hermione let Parvati know the truth – Harry was trying not to get his hopes up. It was the middle of term, of course, therefore those boys hadn't brought those lovely shoes from home, therefore there was probably some way of obtaining those shoes in Hogwarts, therefore it was probably very shady and against the rules, therefore it could probably get them in loads of trouble, therefore _Harry wanted a pair immediately. _

Beaming at Hermione, Harry said, "Exactly! Didn't know you'd taken up mind reading, Hermione. Divination too basic for you? But, yes! Actually, I would have pulled them aside and asked where they'd gotten them from, but I wanted to make sure I wasn't the only one who could see them."

Her brow furrowed, Parvati asked Harry why on Earth no one else would have seen them. He grinned sheepishly, and with reddening cheeks answered, "This one time I was the only one who heard a giant snake in the walls threatening people, and that was a disaster. Didn't want a repeat, yeah?"

Laughing behind her hands, Parvati ignored Hermione, who was quietly praying for patience, and wondered out loud, "Well Harry, you don't think you might be able to find me a pair as well, could you? I'm intrigued."

Waving away an alarmed-looking Hermione, Harry assured her he would try. With that, she left the two friends and made her way back to the common room, daydreaming all the while of herself and that fit Dean Thomas Heeleying away into the sunset together.

* * *

**this is silly trash. self-indulgent garbage. idk what im doing, that was so much fun, but everyone is ooc and its 2:48 am and im a little ooc too! **

**sobs incoherently ~ i just want the muggleborn headcanons to live**

**lots of hugs and kisses and well-meant wishes - tayl **


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